THE DRESS

I was beginning to feel a little sad walking out of those big dressing rooms and standing on a pedestal in front of ginormous mirrors. I did it. About 14 times. 14 dress shops times maybe 10 dresses per store. Definitely more. I went from being so amazed at what a wedding dress can do to you, to thinking I knew what I wanted, to confusing and second guessing myself and then I hit a wall. Liz told me to STOP. take a break and then go back. I did (looked online. not stopping). I rethought JCrew. I thought it was going to be a preowned dress which was cool If I could try it on somewhere else before I took the plunge.

In walks Mary Linn's in Beverly Hills. First of all the mere thought of finding my dress in BH is ludicrous. And a street well known for expensive retail stores. I had originally called Mary Linn's to price out the Marisa 815. They were about $300 more but the woman, Izzi, who answered my questions said "I really do hope you buy your dress here". Seeing as they were priced, or at least that dress, a little higher, I almost didn't make an appointment. It was only because I had ripped out a million magazine ads and was looking at where one of the designers was sold in CA. At Mary Linn's. Okay.

It was a rough work day and some other stuff on my plate and plans at 6pm. I headed over to Robertson, took a left into their parking lot and snagged the last spot. Walked through the door and two women were there to greet me. Tons of dresses. I knew the drill and this was actually the only store that said "only 5 dresses" which is probably a good thing because I usually try on 15 and still walk away with nothing. I asked my consultant Nareh to pull dresses based on my wants/dislikes. The women always know better than you - or me at least. She was a lovely girl and pulled a few maybes. They had an amazing collection. There was no Vera, Carolina and Monique but there was Jim, Manuel, Christos and a small section, no sign, were discounted dresses. I pulled two: a dress that had mint green satin that reminded me of my Grandma B. Light ivory with a satin wrap around at the bottom. Then a close to diamond white silk organza a line dress with a lot happening at the botttom. It was interesting and quite the enigma on its hangar. "I kind of love this" I said to Nareh. "Really?" she said. "Yeah it's really interesting" Then she told me she loved the dresses I pulled - unique, different than most brides. She wasn't just saying it. She was genuine. And that is true. I did not want an "on top of the cake dress". I had all kinds of names for certain dress styles: "too Holly Hobby" "girl on top of a wedding cake" "the circus tent where I would fit my bridal party underneath" "uninspired" and "old woman". There was no traditional or trendy gown in the lot. The question mark dress went on second. I could tell from when she clamped me in the dimly lit dressing room that I was excited to check it out on the big pedestal.

And there it was. My girl.

I didn't cry or freak out. I was in shock. I took it all in. It had been hanging out next to a beaded dress so the top needed a tiny fixin'. Because it was way too big for me it was a harder dress to pull back and see the effect. But I loved it. I finished out my five dress try on and the woman I had spoken to on the phone, Izzi, told me that dress was on sale. By a lot. We all loved it. It was a Manuel Mota for Pronovias dress. It's been discontinued (love that). It was 10K. Then over 6. We thought it was 2K. I kept touching it and thinking. I had said the word love. I haven't thrown that word around with dresses. I've liked and loved just a few and the ones I loved were too expensive. I loved this dress. It was different and beautiful and I was actually excited about the idea of making some alterations to make it even better. My dress. But 2K was still too much. Except that it wasn't. I pulled the tag out. The red tag. That tag said stop. Well actually it said $499. $499. Dollars. They said "This is your dress. Take it!" but I said I wanted to come back with my maid of honor just in case I was being delusional. I looked around a little more and then I knew. I knew every dress in the store - I had tried one on just like it. And it wasn't the dress. That was the dress. I went back and said I wanted it. Alone, no second opinion, this was it. I put it back on and talked with the seamstress. I had an out of body experience paying for it. I loved Izzi and Nareh's faces - happy that I found the one. They knew.

We took more photos and tried on a few veils and then they put it in plastic with my name on it. I could see "Goodfriend" underneath the plastic bag. I meant to take a photo. It was such a moment. It was more than a good friend. It was my new best friend. I had a hard time leaving her behind. But she is mine and I can't wait to get her all fixed up. She's gorgeous and my dress search is over.

Still stunned.